UPSET WIFE - She came home early and found her husband in their
bedroom
making love to a very attractive young woman. The wife was VERY
upset! 'You
are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me a
faithful
wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce
straight away!' And he replied:
'Hang on just a minute luv, so at least I can tell you what
happened.''Fine, go ahead', she sobbed, 'but they'll be the last words you'll
say to me!' And he began:
'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young Lady
here
asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenceless that
I took
pity on her and let her into the car.
I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty.
She
told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion,
I
brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last
night, the
ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight.
The poor
thing devoured them in moments. Since she needed a good clean-up I
suggested
a shower and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were
dirty and
full of holes so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I
gave her
the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear
because
you say they are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was
your
anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good
taste..
I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you
don't wear
just to annoy her and I also donated those boots you bought at the
expensive
boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair like
them..' He
took a quick breath and continued: 'She was so grateful for my
understanding
and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears
in her
eyes and said: 'Please........do you have anything else that your wife
doesn't use?''